Thursday, October 9, 2014

It's OK to be needy.

It's OK to be needy. Yes...yes, you. I'm talking to you too. This is something I've had to tell myself every day the past 6 months. When all I want is to have it all together, to feel good at this busy, crazy, day-to-day life. . . I remind myself of what I don't really want to hear but what I so need to hear. It's OK to be needy. To not have it together ALL the time. To mess up or simply be messy. Because I know someone, and you might too. . . who loves to meet us in our messes, and needy-ness, and all those times we fail at having it 'all together'. 

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A blur. That's what life feels like right now. An overwhelming, exciting, exhausting blur. Every time I blink, I feel like another week's gone by. Literally. Some days go more slowly, and I feel like I'm able to stop, breath it in, and enjoy it. Others fly by, filled with meetings, and longer to-do lists than I know how to do. One day at a time. . . or so they say (whoever they are).

I'm 23wks and 6 days pregnant (but who's counting) and completely amazed we're just a few short weeks away from the 3rd trimester. It makes me a little nervous about the amount of stuff that needs to be done and purchased (everything!) in just 16 short weeks. I have faith that somehow, by January 30th, we'll be settled in a more permanent housing situation, unpacked, with the basic baby essentials purchased and set up. How this is going to happen I'm not sure, but I remain hopeful.

It's been 15 weeks since we moved to this beautiful new city of ours. I'm falling in love with it a little bit more every day. The past weeks have been filled with traveling and visits from family and friends, along with a million other normal life things. I think we had an 8 week stretch of playing the hostess every single weekend. As fun as it was, we were so thankful for the past 2 weekends of just us. We're trying to soak up as much of that as we can these last few months. Just us. It's weird to think they'll be a third little family member soon. I partly feel like she's already with us, especially with her constant kicks to remind me she's there. She's growing bigger and stronger every day. We both are. . . at least the bigger part;)

In August, we enjoyed a lovely 10 day vacation, baby-moon, anniversary trip celebrating our 5 years together. We have never taken a vacation that long, ever, since being married. We usually spend our vacation days visiting my family in WA, and don't have many days left for us to do anything. This year, especially with baby's soon arrival, we wanted to change that.

We've dreamed about driving California's Hwy 1 coast for some time and decided why not now?! We flew into LA, stayed the night with dear friends, and picked up our Mustang convertible the following morning. We spent 3 days driving up the coast, stopping in the most quaint, cute beach towns imaginable. Driving those twisting, curving roads, with the top down, hair flipping in the wind beside my best friend was truly priceless. Our favorite part of the trip by far. And those views! We had to stop every 5 minutes for a better look. Literally!

After that, we were off to Napa and Sonoma Valley for 3 days of wine tasting. We stayed in the sweetest little modern B&B in the middle of no-where Sonoma Valley, complete with a breakfast chef, couples massages, and the coziest little fire pit. It was so peaceful that we never wanted to leave. Julie, the front desk employee, like us so much she gifted us a bottle of champagne for our anniversary. We're saving it for the next special occasion I'm allowed to taste it;)

We finished off our trip in San Francisco. We had gorgeous blue skies and sunshine for our final weekend. We visited the old island prison Alcatraz, and it was one of our favorite parts of being there. We boy did we walk. We saw the Painted Ladies, Haight Ashbury, The Coit Tower, Golden Gate Bridge, of course, and ate our way through the charming and hill-y city.

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If there's one thing I've learned in this major transition season, it's this: My great need for Him every single day; and His great faithfulness to meet me, every single day.

"Relying on God has to begin again every day, as if nothing has yet been done." C. S. Lewis

I can't get this quote out of my head. It's how He made life. How He made us. To need Him every day. To come eat of the bread of life and to come drink the living water every single day. Not just once a week at church. But daily. He's our daily bread. It's His name, it's who He is.

I've never been more away of my needy-ness. It's painful and beautiful. And the amazing thing is He'll meet you exactly where you are, in that needy, messy, desperate place. He's there waiting, if we'll just come.

The next few months are full of a lot more crazy exciting things, so I'll try write again soon to keep you up-to-date.

Thanks for stopping by!



















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